To Grandmother’s House We Go (1992)
THE GIST: Two twin girls – Sarah (Mary-Kate Olsen) and Julie (Ashley) – decide to run away from home and bike to Grandma’s after they hear their single mama call them a “handful.” But as they soon figure out, hitchhiking isn’t easy – and Granny isn’t quite as close as they thought. So they enlist some help from a sorta-friendly delivery dude. But then his truck gets stolen by a pair of old-age bandits (Rhea Perlman and Jerry Van Dyke), who decide to put the girls up for ransom! It’s basically “Green and Red Riding Hoods”. Without all the weird gender-confused wolf stuff. And with a whole lot more neon pants.
NAUGHTY OR NICE?: Way nice. I mean, it’s an early MK and A movie. Not one of Mary-Kate’s current indie pet projects (where make-outs with middle-aged knights are a must). And it was made for TV.
WHY IT GETS US IN THE SPIRIT: It might not have the same effect on older generations – but for anyone who grew up with the Olsens, it’s an awesome reminder of our earliest Christmases – when neon pastel snowsuits were THE COOLEST (or is was it the hottest?), scrunchies were WAY en vogue and Full House was everywhere you looked – and you liked it. (See next item!)
MAGIC MOMENT: Danny Tanner and Aunt Becky make cameos. Need I say more?
SANTA SIGHTING!: Unless you count the bandits – who creepily claim to be “Santa’s Elves.” EWW.
ACCOMPANYING CAROL: Any song from THIS.
PERFECT PRESENT FOR: The 90s kid in your fam. If you can find it on DVD!