BY ARIANA POTICHNYJ
5) Star Wars
Now, do not get me wrong. Having been one of the fortunate many who grew up with Star Wars, I will admit that I even enjoyed the last three of the series. One of my fondest memories ever is the look on my brother’s face when he wasn’t sure if we actually got to skip Ukrainian school to see Phantom or if my parents were being cruel. Nonetheless, with Disney purchasing the rights to Star Wars, I want to yell a loud stop at the dollar signs in Disney’s eyes. But no one can hear you screaming in space.
4) The Bourne movies
Far be it for me to tell Matt Damon and Jeremy Renner’s arms what to do, but I am finding that the Bourne movies are slowly losing their appeal. They are action-packed and a good set of movies for a night with nachos and beer, but I’m finding that there isn’t that same concrete plot moving the story. The Bourne movies are looking as though they are reinventing themselves, so I am willing to put them on the lower half of this list, but if they keep riding on previous Bourne fame, then up the list they shall go.
3) The Underworld series
The series as a whole has never been exceptionally popular, and the fact that it has lived as long as it has is an accomplishment. But the steady decline in quality and, frankly, the steady decline in audiences caring should probably be a red flag for the series. Maybe it’s because I personally don’t care for the films, but no one I’ve spoken to seem to particularly care about them either. Maybe a hardcore fan will be able to change my mind.
2) Toy Story
I know, bring in the doctors, because I’ve clearly lost my mind. But with the announcement of a Toy Story 4, I feel like softly holding the people in charge of that decision and just whispering “No.” For those who didn’t see Toy Story 3, the plot served as a perfect ending to the Toy Story franchise. Millions of young adults cried as their childhood came to close and many went off to college with Andy. The films struck a chord with an entire generation. Now that someone has figured out how to market Toy Story to its full cash-cow potential, they are bringing it back.
1) The Scary Movie franchise
If even one person is shocked by my No. 1 selection, I will eat my hat. The Scary Movie franchise, and that would include any movies made with a similar cast and similar structure, needs to die in the most gruesome way possible. Pop culture references are hilarious, but when the entire plot hinges on successfully jumping from one reference to another (and it’s not even well done like the first two Scary Movie films), it’s time to throw in the towel.