BY MERCEDES MARKS
“I.E.D.” opens on a familiar monster movie trope: blonde girl, running through abandoned school parking lot. I’m no horror buff, but I can tell you what this spells: fatality.
And while I’m never crazy about the murder of a lady before the head credits even roll, I can tell you one thing I am crazy for in this opener: Violet the freshman assassin. I mean, who wouldn’t be? With her slick garrotte and ability to effortlessly swan from murder to lakehouse party, I’m definitely excited to learn more about her.
You know who else wants to learn more? Team Teen Wolf. After discovering the list last week, Scott and Stiles are quick to catch Sheriff Stilinski up on what’s going on (the days where papa Stilinski required a chessboard are long gone–but oh, how I miss them!).
Here’s the scoop on what the Hardy Boys presented: The code Lydia found was a deadpool. There are two parts left to the code. The final total of the deadpool will run a cool $117 million, because it’s being financed by the heist on Peter Hale. And, murder aside, do I find a little (okay, a lot) of joy in seeing Peter Hale watch his fortune get demolished in front of him? Yes. Absolutely, yes I do.
It’s not all mayhem and blood money. Lacrosse is making a comeback in Beacon Hills. Kira’s made the team (yay!), and Liam and Mason (new Jackson and new Danny) are hard at work training for the big game. Derek Hale, in his longstanding tradition of hanging out on high school property when he Should Not Be There, even makes an appearance in the boy’s locker room to give Liam a quick werewolf speech.
I’m not sure how I feel yet about baby beta Liam. I am excited to see how Scott steps into the role of teacher (not as excited as Derek, of course–nobody is as excited as Derek. Did you see how starry eyed he got talking to Scott? Derek trying to get Scott to think he’s cool is the true love story of Teen Wolf). But haven’t we already seen the innocent teen coming to grips with his new life as a werewolf? Wasn’t that kind of first season? Hopefully the show has some cards to still to play, because otherwise, I may struggle to care about Liam.
Lydia keeps trying to lock in the next cipher while Malia hovers so close that if Lydia swapped her easel for a sculpting wheel I’d have accused the two of them of Ghosting. It’s really too bad that Holland Roden made a recent comment taking Teen Wolf‘s queerbaiting to task, or I would be half expecting something real to come out of all the Malia-on-girl flirting running rampant this season.
Eventually Malia settles down and helps Lydia consider the assistance of another banshee. There’s a nice moment where Lydia tries to explain the frustration she has with her powers–the lack of understanding, the lack of control. This season has promised itself as one of discovery for Lydia, but I’m still at a loss on what a full-fledged banshee’s powers are supposed to look like, and it seems like poor Lydia is, too. It’s interesting that Lydia was able to subconsciously call the other Beacon Hills banshee, Bethany, to her aid, though–is this a banshee-to-banshee specific skill, or could Lydia have the potential to develop blanket telepathy in the future?
At the lacrosse game, Stiles, Kira and Scott have circled in on Violet’s boyfriend Garret as the local deadpool assassin. But of course, this is Teen Wolf, so they still have a game to play! Admittedly, I’ve missed the lacrosse montages. This one was a lot of fun to see, especially with Kira kicking ass on the field! Sure, she got immediately benched, but damn, she looked great doing it.
Things get rough on the lacrosse field, because of course they do, and while Lydia and Malia manage to crack the second part of the list, it’s not before Garret and Violet have tagged their next victim, a hapless (if incredibly rude) werewolf from the rival team. Scott can’t save him, but he does thwart a would-be murder attempt on himself from Violet.
Oh, Violet the Freshman assassin. You should know better than to attack a true alpha! Since she’s now in Sheriff Stilinski’s custody, it’s hard to say what might be in store for Violet next, but I have a feeling it’s not going to be a basket of puppies.
Top Line: “If I could grade you on how profoundly you disturb me, you’d be an A+ student.” – Coach Finstock to Stilinski
Top Tune: Gary Numan “Love Hurt Bleed”
Top MTV Promo Hashtag: #werewolfjail